A HOLIDAY GIFT: SHARING OUR GOOD TRAITS

Dr. Tesfa G. Gebremedhin

West Virginia University

I have two friends in one – Frezgy and Zerezgy. Frezgy is kind and generous. He is very friendly and respects everybody, whether the other person is young or old, male or female. Frezgy is a wonderful family man and likes children. He often brings life to his family and joy to his community. Frezgy tells the funniest jokes and many friends indicate that it is fun to listen to his wisdom and wit.

Zerezgy is not a joy. He is the kind of person you can barely stand to be around for even one day out of the year. When Zerezgy comes to a family get-together, he is not there for five minutes before he says something inappropriate and hateful. He likes to criticize others without moral consideration and sometimes his comments bring dead silence among the people around him. Zerezgy likes to talk and hardly listens to anybody.

These two friends are the same person, Naizgy, in the same body and soul. Naizgy is one person made up of Frezgy and Zerezgy and has both the good and the bad traits. We need to realize that we have an angel and a devil in all of us like Naizgy. We all have qualities that fall on opposite sides of the spectrum. The important lesson is that we must interact with people and share our good traits. Knowing that we all have good and bad aspects to our personalities, we can more easily handle the negative characteristics we may see in others by sharing our good traits with them. Respect others’ differences and be open-minded.

Those who are actively involved in the Eritrean communities realize that the most important part of participation in any community is the genuine interaction with the people of the community with honesty and respect. The "people equation" is the most important calculation in interacting and working with people. Effectively dealing with people is to appreciate their point of view. Most of the mistakes we make in dealing with our own people are not caused by ignorance or stupidity - - they are caused by lack of tact and awareness regarding tolerance and cooperation. The key to being more tactful is to take more interest in our own people. We cannot show regard for a person's thoughts and feelings unless we know what his or her thoughts and feelings are. Let’s be empathetic by “putting ourselves in the other person’s shoes” and taking a look at the world as s/he sees it and then we would understand what s/he is thinking and feeling.

This does not mean that we do not stand up for what is right. We can only show others a better way of interacting with each other through the way we ourselves interact by sharing our positive traits. During this holiday season, let’s put our quarrels and squabbles away and embrace our own Eritrean brothers and sisters with open arms. Let’s seek to enjoy the good things about us, and cultivate the best things in our own personalities and share those positive traits with each other. Wish you all a Happy Holiday Season.